It is now 9:53 a.m. on a Saturday here where I sit. Right on schedule, a wave of energy paired with inspiration comes to me—I’m ready to jump into that flow state and churn out creative work.
Ten o’clock is my flow time. Like clockwork. Max knows all about it and makes an effort not to be on the computer or otherwise plan things for us to do at that time.
It happens on weekdays, too, but unfortunately, that’s when people are all coming to me with disparate needs and requests and I can’t focus and produce at what would normally be my most productive time, never mind that my mind naturally tries to turn to whatever is autonomously bubbling out of the deeper reaches of my consciousness at the time. Others (including my mom and my boss) have remarked on my ability to focus on something that engages me and wonders why I don’t seem able to switch that to do whatever it is that teachers or employers want me to do at that time. Don’t get me wrong; my grades and performance reviews have always been good. But they have seen the superhuman flow of 10 o’clock and wonder why I can’t always perform at that level.
As it stands, I take time out of work to try to mop the ideas that are spilling out of my ears and record them in some form in the hopes of turning them into something of value at a later hour, which is hard enough even without being drained from spending eight hours in front of a work computer, producing things that are occasionally still worthwhile, but not…well…shall we say, not the stuff of ten o’clock.
That is not to say that at ten o’clock I produce material directly spun into gold. It needs to be refined to be publish-worthy, for sure. Unfortunately, given the reality of limited time and energy dictated by the 40-hour work week, I rarely get to come back and polish, even when I do get to write at 10 a.m. And I have recognized in myself a fear of what happened in my last post, where I referred to my quickly-dashed-off response to Gail Collins, which had some unpolished gold that she recognized even as I strongly wanted to pull it back and have a chance to refine it, if she was going to title her reader response column after it.
And yet, I fail at doing that. That’s why I so rarely post to this blog, unlike previous journal and blog efforts where I churned out content without worrying about the quality. As you might expect, I produced both more garbage and more gems. As any artistic person will tell you, from photographers to writers, that’s how it has to work.
So! I’m going to try something new here. Given that I can in fact go back and refine what I’ve written in response to comments or just in response to thinking more, I’m going to try to take advantage of it and willingly post more garbage in the hope of also producing more gems. I’m going to spin more unpolished gold with the expectation that I can polish it later.
Starting with this blog!
And I’d like to ask you, readers: do any of you also have a ten o’clock? When is it? What is the experience like for you? Please share in the comments on this page (and not on my Facebook page, if you came from there) so future readers can also join in.